What Moms Need to Know About Boys

I asked my husband, Scott, to give me a little list of a few things that I need to know about my boys.  Well, the list grew into  4 pages.  I will share a few of them with you below.  The rest will come later.  I have written my memories or comments that Scott triggered with his words about our boys under his words.  Being a mom of boys makes life quite exciting.

What Mothers Need to Know About Their Boys:

1. Boys are very forgetful.  They need a mother to help them remember many things such as to wear socks, underwear, brush their teeth, etc.  Now this does not mean for moms to “nag”, but gently remind them more than once of those things. 

•     There is nothing like getting to church and looking down to see your 9 year old not wearing socks under his khaki pants, because he forgot or because I only told him to put his shoes on,  I never said socks. 

2.   When boys reach the age of young manhood around 10 yrs old, they will began to pull away from mom more as they yearn to be more independent.  This in no way indicates that the boys love their moms less, but they are not nearly as huggy and kissy and do not need mom to hold their hand while crossing the parking lot anymore…that becomes embarrassing to them at this point. 

•       I got a very cold shoulder from my 13 yr old when I tried to hug him before he got on a bus bound for Colorado with a church group.  He hugs me plenty in our home, but that is where it stays.  But, my 7 yr old, Ben, has to hug me everyday at least 10 times.  “I don’t think I have hugged you enough yet, Mom.” 

3.  Boys are created wild at heart.  They want adventure in every aspect of daily life, they enjoy an enemy to fight and defeat, a damsel in distress, weapons for battle to help secure their territory and the territory of those in distress…they desire to be that “knight in shining armor”.  This may cause splinters in hands or bruises on the forehead, but rest assure they will heal.  Boys scars are like his trophies….let him get a little scarred up in life. 

•     I will never forget our summer vacation a few years ago.  We rented a house in Silverton CO for a week.  This quaint little tourist town was perfectly set right in the middle of the mountains.  Our house backed up to one of those mountains, so you know what my boys did all week.  One day, we took a walk through town where they boys found some play rifles at a toy store.  Now that mountain became San Juan Hill and they were the Rough Riders, conquering the Spaniards.  I watched countless times from the back door as they would run up the side of the mountain. Then one of the younger boys would trip & fall and come tumbling down.  He would get up pull the grass out of his mouth and run back up.  His story to me would be, “Did you see me roll down that big mountain?  That was cool!” 

4.  Boys like to pickup any strange looking creature they come across.  This includes, but is not limited to, snakes, frogs, spiders, worms, lizards, insects, caterpillars, mice, rats, and the such.  Most of these will end up in the pants pockets of the boys…. from a boys prospective, what are pockets for?  So, always look through boys pockets before washing those pants. 

• This is great advice.  I still remember looking in the washing machine and reaching in to pick up what I I thought was a leaf.  It turned out to be a lizard, with no eyes & all shriveled up!  I don’t know if it went in the washing machine alive or not, but it didn’t survive! 

5.  Boys like things that move fast, make loud noises, and fly high in the air.  Do not be shocked if your boy wants to go faster, higher, and make a louder noise….this is just simply a fascinating challenge to any real boy. 

•   Occasionally my mother or my mother in law will come and get some of the boys for a few days.  It is always a nice rest when they take some boys.  The house is quiet.  But it just isn’t right until they get back home & the noise level returns to LOUD.  Boy noise is different than girl noise.  It is a wild and masculine noise. 

 6.  Boys enjoy being thought of as “handy” around the home.  Mom should ask him to help her if at all possible with opening a jar, taking out the trash, feeding the animals, mowing the yard, hammering in nails for pictures (be careful with this one), gluing something back together and anything like this.  Boys take great pride in knowing that mom thinks he is big enough to handle tougher and tougher jobs….a sign that he is “growing up”.

•  The best way to keep our sons out of trouble is to keep them busy.  Josh just got back from spending 4 days with my parents.  My dad kept him plenty busy with little odd jobs and Josh had a great time.  He felt very useful, needed and grown up.  Our 5 yr old can unload a dishwasher faster than his 12 yr old sister.  He is learning the reward of self satisfaction.

 7.  Boys need heroes to emulate.  Great men that rescued ladies in distress, always ended up winning in the end, were the good guys, fought mighty when in battle, were brave and heroic, men of strong faith that did not back down from the biblical truths, missionaries that took great risk in order to share Christ with a particular tribe, cowboys of the old west, military greats, and so on.  Even fathers and grandfathers can be placed in this category if he is involved in the boys life. 

• My husband loves to read about dead people.  He loves reading their life story and learning from their faith in God or from their mistakes.  Then, he shares this with the rest of us. When he is studying about someone in the Bible and he gets excited about them he will ask you, “Did you know____?” and then proceed to tell us what he has learned.  He has created a hunger in his boys to know more about the hero’s in the Scriptures.  He is our boys’ hero because they know that Jesus Christ is his hero.

A little R&R

How long has it been since you had some quiet time to yourself?

I know that I don’t get it very often.  Just taking the time to sit and write this post seemed almost impossible.  Kids who were normally in bed asleep were not asleep.  My 7 year old was convinced that I hated him because I sent him to bed 10 minutes early for disobeying me.  My 2 year old is afraid of a dog in her closet and my 5 year old fell asleep on my bed, not in his bed.  All I wanted to do was have a little time to myself with just me and my Bible.

Mark 6:31, “Come with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.”

 

Jesus is inviting the apostles to come with him and get some rest.  I like to read that verse as a personal invitiation from my Jesus to get away and get some rest.  He wants me to come to him in prayer and through reading his scriptures and he will give me rest. 

REST!

QUIET!

I MUST  BE DREAMING!

No, our Lord knows how important it is for the mom to get some rest.  We must get replenished and renewed so that we can care for our family.  Jesus knew that if the apostles were to be effective in the ministry to others, they needed rest in a quiet place.

 

Sometimes my quiet place is sitting in my closet.  That is the only place I can find.  I have had many great times of prayer and worship in my closet.  I live in a very busy house and finding a solitary place is very valuable.  I treasure my solitary quiet time.  I Do my best to make time for it, but it doesn’t always happen the way I want it to.  But my Jesus is so amazing that he will meet me where ever I am.  When I am nursing a baby or doing the dishes or even folding the clothes, I can find rest in my Jesus. 

 

It is still important to make that time to get away for a time of quiet, even if it is just 5 minutes.  But when it doesn’t happen the way you plan for it to, know that your Lord will meet you anywhere, anytime.

 

 

His Peace is Mine!

Today is proving to be another challenging day.  No one wants to take a nap when they usually do.  My 5 year old Zachary is not grasping the concept of first time obediance very well, so he thinks his life is over! :)  My oldest daughter is in Puerto Rico on a mission trip and I miss her badly, another daughter and her brother are at church camp…I guess I miss them too.  No, I miss them a lot!  The house is just out of sorts with the kids gone and it makes things crazy. 

Then, I read a verse that I have read a lot, but it was one that I really needed today. Isn’t God good?

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you; I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid (John 14:27).

Jesus started and ended his ministry talking about peace.  He knew that it was crucial for the christian to understand His peace so that they could live the abundant life he had for them.  He gives us his peace. “MY peace I give to you.”  He doesn’t give us the peace of the world, that is determined by circumstances.  He gives us his heavenly peace that is always there no matter what is going on around us.  We don’t have to be troubled or afraid of what is to come because we as believers already have his peace.

Here is what Ray Stedman has to say about peace.

“But Jesus says, “I give peace right in the midst of trouble, right in the midst of distress and turmoil and heartache and pressure. I can impart peace to your heart right there, and not as the world gives.” Why? Because we can return to that basic relationship we have–”You in Me, and I in you.” Out of that comes the guarantee that He is working out His purposes. He will bring us to the end of the trouble. He will still the storm and quiet the waves. We rest in the boat, content, knowing, “No water can swallow the ship, where lies the Master of ocean and earth and sky.” That is peace.”  (www.raystedmon.org)

It doesn’t matter what is going on in my life right now, I can have peace.  How wonderful and energizing to know that the yuck that the world throws at me does not determine whether or not I am at peace.  Our life has been a constant roller coaster ride for many years now and there are days when I just ask God how much longer are we to endure.  He always reminds me through his word that no matter what is going on he still has me in the palm of his hand, loving me, sustaining me and I will always have his peace.

I have a visual picture in my head of how to attain this.  I see myself in a boat floating around.  There are waves coming up and hitting my boat.  Sometimes I get water on me and sometimes I don’t.  Sometimes a lot of water gets in my boat and I get worried that I will sink, but no matter how much water comes in I don’t sink.  Sitting in my boat with me is my Jesus and we talk.  I tell him that the water scares me sometimes and I want it to stop.  His answer is simple, “Stop looking at the water, look at me.”  I focus my eyes on his eyes. I can still feel the water, but because my eyes are focused on his eyes I can’t see the water as much and don’t fear it anymore.  I am at peace in the midst of my storm.

Some days my storms are small.  Kids are fighting, door bell keeps ringing, someone is sick.  And then other days the storm is huge, almost too much to take.  No matter the size of the waves, when my eyes are on Jesus, they just don’t seem so big anymore and I can experience his peace.

Prayer;

Father,

Your gift of peace saves me from so much turmoil.  I can still feel the waves of adversity hitting my boat, but because of you I know that I cannot sink.  Thank you for your assurance of salvation daily.  Everyday I can come to you and know that you will love me inspite of all my sin.  Thank you for forgiving me over and over when I forget to look to you and I cry out for relief.  Help me to remember that your peace is mine, and you are working out your purpose for me.  I look forward to the day when your purpose will be complete.  A~Men.

Laughing so I won’t cry

I have days sometimes when the storm of chaos is brewing around me I really feel like crying, but instead, SOMETIMES (not always) I just laugh.  A very wise friend told me once that I will laugh at it 20 years from now so I might as well laugh now. 

Here are a few questions I heard myself asking my “tribe” this week.

•  Who dissected the grasshopper on the kitchen counter? You left the head and the legs behind!
• Why is the dog wrapped in toliet paper?
• Why are there blue marks all over the wall?
• Why does Gracie have blue ink all over her?
• Where did your hair go?
• Can you give Mommy the scissors?
• Can you give Mommy the markers?
• Can you give Mommy her keys?
• Can you give Mommy a BREAK?
• Why is there a frog in the sink in the guest bathroom?
• Where is my big mixing bowl?
• Why is there a turtle in my mixing bowl?
• Who took my chocolate?
• Can we have just five minutes of peace?
• How about one minute?
• Why is the dog running through the house covered in soap suds?
• Why do you have silver spray paint on your behind?
• Why did you spray his behind with silver paint?

Proverbs 31:25, “She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.”

I have a choice to make every minute of everyday.  I can let the little things that happen each day give me an opportunity to laugh or cry.  Believe me, it isn’t easy to laugh when I keep finding my good bowls outside with critters in them, or the frog in the bathroom sink.  Many times I don’t laugh, mostly I try to hold my breath so that I don’t blow my top.

These days are fleeting. They are passing really fast!  I can laugh or I can cry.  I choose laughter!

Three of my reasons to laugh.

 

(Samuel Addison)

  

 

(Zachary Asher)

(Kaylin Grace -”Gracie”)

 

 Proverbs 15:13

“A happy heart makes the face cheerful.”

Protect Their Minds

Father,

We find ourselves in such a depraved society.  Just walking out our front door can prove to be unhealthy to our minds.  Our eyes see things we do not want to see and our ears hear things that we really don’t want to hear. 

Please protect my children’s mind.

I can only shield them from so much and I know that they will still come in contact with great evil, protect their minds.

Help them to learn how to take captive every thought that enters their mind.  Help them to grab hold of the foolish and sinful thoughts that would take them away from you and throw them out.  Help them to remember that they can do this in your name.  Help them to hold close and cherish the thoughts that will draw them closer to you.  Help them to recognize the differance.

Protect their minds from lust when the hormones begin to rage inside of them.

Protect their minds from jealousy when friends have nicer things than they do.

Protect their minds from pride when they recognize abilities in themselves that others may not have.

Give their minds grace when they meet others different then they are.

In a world that teaches that sin is o’k if it makes you feel good, my children are up against an ongoing battle to keep their minds pure.  Put in their heart a desire to seek your pureness and your presence.  Guide me as their mother to also keep my mind on everything that you find excellant or praiseworthy. (Philippians 4:8).

I pray this in your most powerful name.  A~men

2 Corinthians 10:4-5 “The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”

Philippians 4:8 “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”